The Perfect Golf Cigar

Now when it comes to golf I don’t believe in luck.  My friend JImmy says that you have to be good to be lucky which makes so much sense to me.  Jimmy is full of these nuggets of golf wisdom, he’s been golfing since he was a young lad and although he is small in stature he can pound it off the tee box so hard you can actually hear the ball in the air as it disappears into the unknown.  He learned long ago that yelling “Fore” was really unnecessary because whenever his balls go off course they travel so far that no one would ever believe that they had just been hit by a golf ball that belonged to someone 4 fairways over.  Incidents seem to happen when we show up so a little trick we’ve learned is to mix it up whenever booking tee times, its not such a good idea to go to the same track more than 2 days in a row.  I guess its an insurance deal, I dunno, I just go with what Jimmy tells me.

A few days ago I wake up, put on the coffee, look out the window, see that it was sunny and then I  waited………. 5… 4… 3… 2… 1… There’s the phone!  ” We have a tee time at Country Meadow$ in an hour and a half!”  Jimmy is sounding particularly chipper this morning which tells me that he had a hot date last night so I know it’ll be a good 5 hours of camaraderie and hair raising tales of romance and love.  I jump in the shower then put on my lucky fishing shirt, my lucky socks, my lucky golf shorts and spend 15 minutes tearing up the house looking for my lucky hat. All of my wardrobe is in order so all I have to do now is decide what cigar to take along.  Something tells me that today is a Montecristo No. 2 kinda day, the Meadow$ have got punishing greens and whenever I’ve needed an edge with my putts, the Montes have never let me down.

My driver was working well all through the front nine and I wasn’t hitting it really far but I could count on it to keep me in the fairways.  Jimmy had only one errant drive on 7 and was ahead of me by 4 strokes so that meant today I was was the guy buying hot dogs at the snack shack tucked in just behind the clubhouse.  We were playing at a pretty good pace and never once had the course marshall on our backs telling us to speed up but waiting for the ambulance attendants to get off the cart path beside the 9th green was going to slow us down a bit.  I picked up 2 dogs, a couple of beer and overheard the cops saying that it was unusual that no fingerprints were on the pro V1 that they were putting in the plastic bag for evidence.  Jimmy is a details guy, off to 10 !

I love the back nine at the Meadow$ and have always done well there.  I never had more than one 3 putt so I knew once again that the Monte mojo was on my side.  Jimmy was on fire today and beat me by 10 strokes, he usually beats me and thats why I love golfing with him.  You can’t learn how to be a better golfer if you play with people that slow you down and ruin your focus, like I said before, I don’t believe in luck.

As I was driving home my thoughts were on all of the cigars I had smoked in the last 10 or so years out on the golf course.  If I’m having a really good day with the driver then its probably because I had a Bolivar Belicosos Finos that day as my faithful companion.  Nothing can get your short game dialed in like a Trinidad Fundadores because the concentrated honey and espresso flavors tend to relax your shoulders so from 150 yds out you can pretty much drop the ball 3 feet from the pin 95% of the time.  But at the end of the day the Montcristo No 2 will surely be your most valuable ally when totaling up the score because its on the green where half of the golf strokes take place.  Try it, do you think I just make this stuff up????

»crosslinked«